Silence

No Gold in Silence

They say silence is golden

It is.

Except when it stretches between you

And me

A lead curtain

I have called out to you

Only my own voice echoes back across the chasm

I reach out my hand

Fingers grasp emptiness

Trying to hold a phantom

Seeking the smallest flaw in the fabric to rend it in two

To shatter silence

let our song be heard.

I don't know if you have ever struggled with silence, whether it's a friend or a spouse giving you the "silent treatment" because they are angry (not a technique I'm very good at, I like words far to much to be silent) or the long waiting for a distant loved one to write or call, especially when that wait becomes uncharacteristically long, or the heavens seem made of brass when you pray, silence can be terrifying. As days of silence linger we start to listen to those ugly lies-you know the ones; "he doesn't love you anymore", "she thinks x, y & z about me", "there is someone else, I've been replaced", "I've strayed too far, God isn't talking to me anymore". And, unfortunately, except when it comes to God's opinion, we've been proven right enough times to circle back again & again to the pain the lies cause.

When God seems silent, that is another matter entirely. There is an old saying -"if God seems distant, guess who moved?" I wonder if God sometimes isn't silent, graciously waiting for us to finally STOP talking and listen. And there are times I think His silence is merely encouragement to press in, to hold fast to faith, to rest in the quiet places.

James writes: "You do not have because you do not ask God. When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives (4:2-3)" What have you been asking for? Why have you been asking? I suppose the same is true of our companions. Are they silent because we have not allowed them to speak? Have we been unwilling to explore comfortable silence? What have we been asking for in our other relationships? Why?

Silence can be alarming, if we never allow room to be quiet, alone or with each other. Conversation is wonderful, and necessary, maybe we should learn to let silence be the same.